madness takes its toll: please have exact change ready
outside your window
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reversible clothing comes in really handy sometimes
your name is great and so are your opinions https://t.co/zJqdpz9wxj
this is sexy as hell https://t.co/MmbJoXgFYN
“He sees you when you’re sleeping, he knows when you’re awake” it’s as if whoever wrote the above Christmas carol knew me personally
neighbors complaining about the wicker man i’m building on my front lawn just wait until they see what i do with it!
Jesus was probably a vorarephiliac
goodnight, sweet prince
i sure hope Blake Shelton plays me in the second season of Mindhunter he’s a dreamboat!
great... my dog Harvey is now claiming i sexually harassed him i don’t want to suggest he “asked for it” or anythi… https://t.co/AzP3nl5wkc
Charlie Manson is the conceptual artist of killers
guns are cheating
today is when the real fun happens
i like to think i put the weenie back in Hallowe’en
always fun when my dog Harvey and I drink some isopropyl 70% while decorating the blackthorn tree on Devil’s Night! season’s greetings!
you should probably sit down before reading this, but the blog where i rate every single episode of The Facts of Life is almost ready
a tisket, a tasket, NOT LONG, but don't blow a gasket! https://t.co/mvh4GOHFwN
i didn't, and yes https://t.co/7r7UCbhvHb
just a relaxing weekend in the country... https://t.co/u2LQYIoxFo
when a chimp does something like this it's "adorable", when i pull the same thing i'm chased by torch-wielding mobs… https://t.co/SQSZQGGq6L
i feel the same way about Halloween that secret alcoholics must feel about St Patrick's Day https://t.co/77hpToXaJ5